If an updated version of the Bible were available that reflects the values of the George Bushes and Tony Blairs of this world, this is what the Sermon on the Mount might look like:
You have heard that it was said, ‘an eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I tell you who hear me: Demand a head for an eye. Hate your enemies, crush those who hate you, destroy those who curse you, obliterate those who disagree with you. If someone strikes you on the one cheek, not only should you strike back with extreme prejudice, you should also strike a few of their friends and neighbours – otherwise you might get your other cheek struck and that would be totally unacceptable. Never under any circumstances allow anything to be taken from you: it’s yours and you earned it. Cloak-takers and borrowers are just lazy and jealous of your success. If the meek somehow get something off you anyway, fight like hell to get it back. Do unto others whatever is necessary to force them to submit to your authority.
I think I might do a series of updates for evangelicals and charismatics. Just need to get my hands on a Bible somehow…